Thursday, November 16, 2006

Billy Goats Gruff

Well, it had to happen.

I've lived in fear of it for years.

I somehow knew that someday, some young person would look me squarely in the eyes, purse up their lips in disgust, haul off and call me a troll.

And not only a troll, but "the worst kind of troll there is"!

I'm not exactly sure what that kind of troll might be. I wasn't aware of the subtle levels and gradations of said trolls. But to be branded the worst kind? Wow.

I gladly participated in Joe's Special Open Thread Thursday today. You know, the one where he suggested that those of us so inclined might go to Paypal and donate some money to Mike Jones, who is having a rough time of it. I sent him my jukebox money. Those of you who know me will understand what that means. For the record, I have no compunctions regarding Mike's prior career choices, whatsoever. In the words of James Leo Herlihy, "a person's gotta make a living".

I'm real tired of being insulted and stepped on by religious zealots who, in their private lives, are doing things that would probably make me blush. And I'm ready and willing to support anyone who comes out swinging against them. This is guaranteed not a make that person particularly popular in places that are situated some distance away from major bodies of water. To me, what Mike Jones did was heroic. And here's what happened:

  • Lots of young gay men called him old and ugly;
  • No major gay-supported organizations (hint: HRC) have even acknowledged his small but potent role in last week's election;
  • He probably stands a very good chance of losing whatever legitimate employment he does have;
  • He's being cast as a pariah by many in his own so-called community.

When I've objected to any of this, I've been told to lighten up, develop a sense of humor, and now, I've been called a troll because I suggested that if you wanted to donate you should, and if you didn't, well then, did we have to hear that "hooker/crystal/poor Mrs. Haggard" diatribe again.

Oh yeah. Then I was told to shut up.

By an ex-blogger who has a photograph of young things toasting each other with jello shots on his page.

Thanks, got me blogging again.

P.S. If you too feel so inclined, hit up Paypal, enter Mr. Jone's account (, and show some love.


Blogger Vitale said...

I guess I have the WORST taste in trolls... how exciting!

6:52 PM  
Anonymous Toby said...

Here. Educate yourself:

Stop taking it so seriously. It's pretty obvious that you're flattered.

7:19 PM  
Anonymous rangergeek said...

If trolls get to look like you, I can't wait to become one.

8:05 PM  
Blogger Homer said...

I want to be a troll too!

8:06 PM  
Anonymous bryce said...

that's hilarious!

you could crush that little anger twink with your left pinkie.

As if we needed reminding, from the urban dictionary:


A young urban gay male who goes through his life very angry because:

1) The rest of the gay world does not recognize his incredible hotness.

2) The rest of the gay world is not incredibly hot, like he is.

Identifying characteristics: Angertwinks can often be spotted wearing fauxhawks, popped collars, and expressions of disgust.

Sneering at his own fabulous reflection, the angertwink simultaneously plucked an errant hair from his razor thin brows and did a tiny discreet bump of cocaine while throwing shade upon the crowd of trolls waiting to wash their unworthy hands.

7:32 AM  
Blogger Norskybear said...

Monte always says that I go for gnomes more often than trolls, but with you, I could make an exception.

It is ironic that Toby called you a troll when you were advocating that the thread not degenerate into a divisive discussion.

And, I find it very funny that Toby has to search you out and post on your blog when he is too busy being fabulous to continue with his own. I guess it must be exhausting being that perfect.

And I LOVE the term angertwink! God, I know too many of those from the rugby team.

9:59 AM  
Blogger Nate The Great said...

Glad to see you bloggin again, I always look forward to your entries, too bad it had to be an asshat with some lame comments to get you motivated. :-)

6:12 PM  
Blogger circleinasquare said...

Delicious trolls.

10:25 PM  
Blogger David said...

I stopped reading viviblurry a while ago. His jokey narcissism and bitter arrogance made me nauseous. If you are that jaded before you turn 25 you might as well just shoot yourself.

I have been hit on by many a troll in my day and you, sir, are no troll.

3:13 PM  
Anonymous Stash said...

I haven't heard the term "throwing shade" in years.

4:03 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

i love this post.

it's like when some with really cheesy taste (like vividblurry) calls you tacky because you aren't dressed like them and all you can do is laugh.

bottom line - he lives in DC. nuff said. it's easy to be a big angertwinkfish in a small pond.

you rock kane.

8:01 PM  
Blogger Joshua said...

I saw that comment and it really pissed me off. Actually the whole mob mentality on that particular post pissed me off! If you're a troll than I'm a troll; and we both know we ain't trolls :) You also have to look at the source of that comment. If it really was the person (as it seems some like to leave comments as if it came from another person) he's a LOSER. I know as we live in the same city. He's all of like 24, and believe me - from what I see of you; you and I had a lot more going on in the looks and intelligence department when we were that age. I know that wasn't nice for me to say - but hey; it's the truth :)

11:21 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

The fun thing with angertwinks is when they are so high on the party drug du jour that, as they throw pointless attitude at some poor soul, they turn and fall down on their face.

Seen it, loved it, laughed hard. Here's wishing!


10:09 AM  

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